Happy Poly Days everyone. Hasn't been much of anything this year with all the rain and such. But, we managed to get the parade and a small event in before the wicked winds hit and put a stop to things. Too bad. There was some awesome events planned. But, next time maybe! It did turn out to be a nice night spent it's the family. Everyone was getting stir crazy at home, darn rain. So we went cruising. Milkshakes and fries was our destination and good times were had.
So, this week, I celebrated my five years of sobriety with my group. Usually we celebrate on the last Thursday of every month, if there is a party to be had that month. You know, it's one thing for me to blog about my sobriety. Don't get me wrong, it's still a strong message and a powerful time for myself, but to be in a room full of people who are fighting the same fight, with the same demons as I am. That's really powerful. So, in my journey, yup, I'm still floating from my sobriety. Sure, I talk about his topic a lot. A lot. I talk about it on the job site. I talk about it with my family friends and strangers. I refuse to not talk about these demons. It has been such a huge program for me. And one thing I have learnt is this. You are not the only one! Your demons are not unique to you and you alone. There are people out there who are dying from the same issues you have. Staying mute, gives the demons power. Staying open and honest about these things empowers the individual.
You know, since my near relapse a few months ago, so much has changed for me. So many more gifts and freedoms have hit me smack in the groin!! I trucking love being sober! I love remembering what I did last night. No longer do I run out to see if I drove the night before or not. Is the truck smacked up again? It's in the impound? Oh sugar snaps! Normally I did. Black out drunk, and I would drive home. Just did not give a hoot about nothing or no one. Turns my sco age to think if these things today. Yes even to the point of walking the razors edge with the devil and his death sauce. Walking the razors edge, I was that edge!! Haha! So, on your birthday, your group, allow the said individual to share their experience, strength and hope, for the majority of the time spent. There is no stronger sense of accomplishment than watching a fellow sufferer succeed and turn recoverer. I gotta say, while the sharing was going around the tables, people kept saying to me, "Will, you are my inspiration! I barely have five weeks and here you are with five years! Will, do you think we can get together for coffee and you can share you're secrets with me?".........Wow! Are they serious, me? I'm an inspiration? Yes, I have heard these words before from numerous people, but when a fellow sufferer is choking back tears while trying to find the words that are complimenting you, that is humbling. Thursday night was the most powerful birthday I have ever had. Listening to these guys, not only takes me back to the day I sobered up, but inspires me to push harder to continue achieving greatness in my sobriety. So, when it was my turn to stand up and share, I had to address these questions. I said something like, "yo, listen up! There are no secrets to this program. In fact secrets will kill you. So, the secret I guess is this, share you're experience, strength and hope. Share with your mom, share with your neighbor, if they want to listen. What are you waiting for, gosh darn it? Are you waiting for an invitation? Then here it is. I give all of you an invitation to step it up and be the humans we are supposed to be. Get out of the chair and do the step work. Do it honestly and openly. Do not harm each other any more. Embrace each other and show love in times of darkness. Yes asking for help is showing love. So, when you're stuck, get out of your ego and ask for help. Why because, our ego got us here, and asking for help will take us out of here!"
Now, I want to take a second and talk more to whoever is or may be still struggling out there with your demons or life. I'm not Mr.Duncan right now. I'm a humble servent of the human spirit. Just like your demons and your higher powers, I'm nameless and faceless. In my opinion, our blessings and our downfalls, are not unique, we are all the same. It's the cold facts of life that I had to listen to before I could move on. All of our problems and differences can be brought to one underlying factor. Fear! Face it, at one point of your journey, maybe yesterday, today, or tomorrow, you question why and you dig down and fight back. I needed to tear the situation apart and understand why I want to fight back so much. Fear! I'm scared. Okay, but of what? Everything is going great, why do I question so much? Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate! No! Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure! It is our light; not our darkness that scares us! You know without a doubt you can do it. And you slow down or you shut down. Why though? You go right to the nitty gritty bone truth of it and you were about to reach that next plain and you knew it. Your body and spirit was telling your mind this and it couldn't compute. And you question everything? Scared of success. Because it's easier to give life an excuse to beat me then it is to give myself reasons to succeed!
But hey is for horses, that's what keeps life interesting. New challenges and lessons to be learnt. Good stuff. Well until next time folks
Good day
I'm Mr.Duncan
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