Opportunity

 Well, and then this happened. So, my straw boss, my number on site. We had a very constructive conversation a few weeks ago, and he has been pretty darn good ever since. Minor, minor issues, nothing but learning curve kinda stuff. So all is good and dandy. Yesterday happens and he does not show up to work. Well, thats not my new guy, this isnt like him. Sure, he has a reputation at work and most of it is good, but like all of us, he has demons to work on. and they are starting to catch up. They are starting to control him.... sounds like a simular situation i have been in oh, around eleven years ago. i have felt the way he looked. I know how his mind was probably racing while I was trying to carefuly explain the situation and repercussions of his prior actions. 

Talking drugs and alcohol addictions is truly a scary thing to a lot of people. I am one of them. ONly through swallowing pride and trying to squash the damn ego outta the way..... I see a lot of people get shifty when that comes up... Hitting nerves. It seems like people with these ailgments always seem to find me on site. That's cool. I really don't mind. Every one needs someone and i can relate to the boys out in the field. Yeah, eating dirt sandwiches and dust in our water. to guys like us, our crews are our families. I spend far far more time with the crew than i do the family. Like 3 months to a week kinda ratio. That's life. Take into account that we are proud to be out here. We take great pride in what we do, and get alot of heat for doing what we do. That's life. i guess, what i am saying is that it takes a breed to do this, and with that breed of people, comes a lot of ego and pride. Well, with that comes a hesitation to ask for help. It actually a real bad problem for us. Slowly, one person at a time, i help break that cycle. Anyway i can. 

Today was a tough conversation to have. It sucks walking up to a fella and knowing i am going to literally fuck his day up. Not maliciously either. Hard no. To truly put out the hand of help and say hey man, please, now is the time to say if you need help or not. Please tell me now if you need help or not my man. Thankfully he took a moment. Took a deep breath and said yes man, i need help. Perfect, now, we can start the conversation we really need to have. And we can have this conversation with the right people. And so we did. Steps and progress has been made. 

I know just simply how dark and desperate of a place his mind may be in. Man, i have seen that muther fukers eyes. Ohh i have felt him squeezing on me. Some times i still feel that devil trying me. Ha. Nice try buds, but ill tell ya one thing for free, today is not your day to fuck with me. No, probably not even tommorrow either. Schedules booked up. Ha. But, if you dont have thiose tools yet, you dont and wont know how to spin circles around that devil. Yeah it is a process. Straight up sucks some days. It is worth it though. Every single second of it. 

I really and tryly hope nothing but the best for this man. I know he has the desire in him. I saw it in his eyes. I heard it in his voice. It is all good though. You are in a good place now. So, i didi tell him and the people involved that i want him back on my crew as my straw! I want you to come back strong and sober man. You have a job with me. That i want to make very clear with everyone. I have your back here. The whole way.

So yeah, that did happen, happy it did. It kinda was a solid reminder to myself about, I guess how I don't want my life to end up. Been there, done that, no thanks at all. I am good. Ha. One day, this man I write about tonight, maybe in the future he will have the opportunity to spread his hope, his help, and his joy to someone else; just like i have been graced with. 

It is an opportunity. Because, the man upstairs did make this happen. The creator, thought up this plan and its being executed the way it is supposed to go. What do we say, when a lesson presents itself, pay attention. I now understand why this man was put on my crew. It all makes sense now. 

Welllllllllp, 

i suppose that's it for now. 

Talk to ya soon

Mr.D